That perfect ARMCHAIR

Today while shopping for some stuffs in KL i found the perfect armchair for my house. Its so nice. the color, the shape, the texture. PERFECT. Now i just need to convince the banker to invest in it.

Yet another dream

I had always imagined about how my mid 20's would be. Living alone in a flat with simple but chic interior. Having coffee in a coffee shop while reading my newest book every afternoon. Come home, cook dinner and bake my desert and bread for the next morning. Start painting again in my workshop and designing my own home furnishing brand. Go to gym and visit the orphanage while dropping off some cakes and biscuits I baked the night before. I would visit my cafe, managing the staffs while figuring out new promotions and menu for the cafe.

Every other day I would go out with my girl and catch a movie, cook her dinner and take a walk on the beach or park. I would go to my parent's house and have dinner every weekend. I would hang out with my friends, visit my God father and have interesting conversations.

Every week I would take my nephews out for some grocery shopping and let them play with my cat named KAT (short for KATHY). I would also study for my second degree in interior design while going for a part time course in cooking and business. I would try to help my parents with my two little sister’s educations.

Yes this is how I imagine my mid 20's would be. I almost have it all but life is really a strange thing, when you thought you almost have it all; it’s all gone. Papa and Krystyn are right, I am a man and I cannot afford to break down so often. The only reason I am writing all this today is because I wanted to remind myself of my own dreams, my ambition, and the way of life I had planned since I was a boy.

I know I have a long way to go before I have all this and maybe I would not achieve it by my 25th birthday but I am certain to work for it. There is no point of wanting something without working for it. I started to paint, bake and design the remaining portion of Kaye Residence. I managed to get her attention again. I got two dozen cupcakes order from my neighbour to fulfil this weekend, finding cooking and interior design school as well. It’s a start. I hope everything would turn out ok.

Excuse me.

I had to admit that the only reason why I did not post anything on this blog all this while is because I’m distancing my self. I haven’t been my self lately, mounted feelings. I kept on thinking why I should update my blog? Why should I bother to care to write? Yes I’m angry and I am sad. Why? I feel like a creep, writing crap in monotonous tone of chirpiness. Fuck, why should I pretend to be happy when I’m not?

Yes I am not happy. I am not happy with work, with my self, my weight; my freaking messed up houses, the way I look, the way i write, etc. To sum it all I’m not happy at all and I’m trying freaking hard to be happy but I’m not.

So what if some whack said I am one ungrateful person, having all that I have and still unhappy. How can I be happy? Tell me, how can I be happy when all my life I was never able to do things that makes me truly happy, never to follow my own ambition, scared to eat that extra food coz people freaking comment on my 0.5kg weight gain, telling me how ugly I am all the time regardless the efforts I put to look good, never once feel special about my self. Soon to be locked away in that 7ft barbed wired, photo-beamed prison.

Until i can cope with all these madness again i will not post. I need some time to find peace again.

JJ's 18th Birthday

Finally i feel like writing again. On the 23rd of June my God brother, JJ; celebrated his 18th birthday. These are some pics i took. Happy birthday JJ, now you are a big boy!

Aku dah sewel

It’s not written on stone. Yes that’s what it is. I ponder, I braised, and I faze and paused. This is the reality, this is the thing, this is it and it is now. She is back. Some assassination of character, deter but needed.

Fascinations brailed comforts lost, blind. Do I need to, shall I, mere questions. Doubts rose shackled in mind poisons the heart. Dabbled deep, heart thwarted torn of past mistakes. Yes, I should.

Heroes 3 "Villains"

I came upon this trailer while browsing youtube. The very much and long anticipated Heroes series.

In support of product RED

If you went through my archive you can find a post about product RED and all the good things they are doing to save and help countries which are struggling with AIDS.

Today I would like to present to you the work of an aspiring interior designer and also my good friend Norul Haidar Zainudin. This aspiring fresh grad designer had produced and designed a space/boutique for product RED. These are some pictures of her design. As her friend I would say I’m really proud that she had chosen to design for Product Red. Although this project only served as her final year project and not a life project I think she did a really good job. One, designing for a brand with a good cause and secondly I really like her designs.

If you have any inquiries about her designs and probably about the designer herself you can contact the designer using the following details:

Name: Norul Haidar Zainudin
Email: norulhaidar@gmail.com
Contact Number: 0192205968